Your September Horoscope! by Crystal “Kitty” Shimski

Transcribed by guest contributor Jennifer Coates / Kitty divides her time between New York City and Montauk. She is a freelance Intuitive Technique Specialist and part-time Trance Inducer. She was recently certified in Trauma Re-alignment and holds a dual Associates Degree in Breath Dancing for Painters and Creative Shock Control from the Online Academy of Spiritual Transit. She is devoted to helping painters live out their truth on the surface of their choosing.

Libra 9/23-10/22
Your ruling planet, Venus, will restore balance to an uncomfortable situation with a friend. You felt snubbed because he/she invited someone else to a party or dinner or event. Venus is now telling you, through me, to return the favor by snubbing them back. What’s fair is fair. Make sure to take pictures of yourself at the event you attend with your other friend and post them on social media right away. You will bask in this trivial revenge. In other news, you must learn to communicate properly. If you have performance anxiety, time to get over it. A lunar eclipse towards the end of the month will help you gain clarity about your career prospects. Chin up! The news simply is not good, but you can take it, toughy! Meanwhile things are moving along nicely in the studio: always remember that whatever can’t be resolved in life can always be resolved on canvas.

Scorpio 10/23-11/21
The universe is giving you the green light in terms of your paintings, your career and your self-confidence. You know what this means: you are going to be really annoying. Do not be surprised when people back away from you during casual conversations or excuse themselves to run to the bathroom. You are too intense. If you care about your friendships as much as yourself and your career, you will take it down a notch, if you receive my meaning. After the middle of the month, you will feel emboldened to pursue a long dreamed of goal. However, money is still tight so try to paint more thinly for the next little while. Or try ballpoint pen on paper towels. You love the color blue! (Just don’t press too hard.) The money will start rolling in again soon but for now: be prudent!

Sagittarius 11/22-12/21
A huge development is in store for you in the studio this month. You will blend this style with that style in a way no one has ever seen. You will abuse your surfaces, tune in with the times, channel what is important to art and fashion and break through to another level of originality that will be hailed by all the most major types. People will think you are younger than you are. Really, it won’t ever get any better for you than this month, so please try to enjoy it. Look at yourself in the mirror a lot and say “yes, I did it.” Practice smiling – a real smile! The fake one you think you have perfected is actually not so cute. You are in a position of greater respect and authority for the next several weeks. Own your greatness! But understand its inherently fleeting nature and take it gracefully when you are on your way back down.

Capricorn 12/22-1/19
Both in terms of money and your bowels, expect to see more movement this month. An investment of some kind is paying off. Your ambition is pushing you into new territory in the studio and socially. You are emboldened to ask for studio visits and your work is getting just interesting enough to be included in an out of town group show. Little by little you will climb the art mountain and get the respect you so crave. But you’re not there yet and no one feels it more keenly than you, Capricorn. Loosen up! Talk to yourself out loud in the studio. Paint in the nude. Rub yourself onto your paintings, rub paint onto your bathing suit area. I am telling you it’s ok, part of a magical self-acceptance ritual that will definitely help your career. You’ll see!

Aquarius 1/20-2/18
You need to learn how to wait for events to unfold, rather than pushing them to a premature conclusion. It never works out well for you when you try to exert too much control. This holds true in the studio as much as in life. You will only piss people off and make crappy paintings with such a tight grip on things. However let me say your paintings are looking pretty good, despite your problematic personality. Green is your color this month, even though your friend told you in a recent visit you are not very good with that color. Listen to Kitty. You will see dramatic improvements in your relationships after September 6. You and your spouse come to an understanding that will be mutually beneficial. A final word of advice: try not to think about your students or your splintered friendships in the studio, after all, they are not thinking of you.

Pisces 2/19-3/20
You are not being as authentic as you could be. Try harder! It is crucial to your artistic practice to be an honest person to yourself, your mate and annoying neighbor. That said, you are making amazing progress in the studio this month. It’s ok to listen to the same album over and over again in order to keep focused. If your back hurts, take painkillers. If your eyes and hands are sore, suck it up and keep going. One way or another all this work will pay off. For reals! After the solar eclipse on the 16th, you will merge with your third eye, your inner self and your imaginary doppelganger. There is nothing you cannot accomplish with this mystical enrichment of your psyche. Your skin will finally clear up and you will stop belching. A new deli will move in down the street from your studio. You will now graze on meats throughout all your days and never suffer in the tum.

Aries 3/21-4/19
Some might say setting limits is a good way to go for you, but not me. Kitty thinks you should exhibit no self-restraint in any area of your life. It doesn’t suit you to hold back. As the reflective moon crosses path with explosive Jupiter, you have big ideas in the studio and finally some energy to make them happen. When you are frustrated with what you make, please try not to ruin it this month. Looking back you will see some genius moves that at first looked crappy. You are in demand socially but not always up for the “fun.” Take time out for yourself or you will say something you will immediately regret. The stars are aligned for a fulfilling month – hopefully you will smarten up and enjoy it. Take sedatives with you wherever you go and remember your breath mints.

Taurus 4/20-5/20
You will start to feel comfortable in your own skin for the first time in your life. Domestic matters resolve as do your problematic new paintings. It turns out that using lots of pink really was a great idea. If you don’t have a gallery you will feel emboldened to begin looking for one again. If you do have one you will feel emboldened to find a better one. The planets are aligned for your happiness this month and it is an auspicious time for you to be you and wielding a paintbrush! Even though you feel like nothing is happening things are happening. Your talents are in demand whether that means friends are asking you to do light plumbing favors or you are getting teaching jobs. The only hiccups in your life are financial and who cares about those. You are learning how to eat from dumpsters and repair your clothes the old fashioned way. You will be fine, just like your friends incessantly tell you.

Gemini 5/21-6/20
Communication with your significant other, your friends and/or your students is compromised this month. But don’t worry, most people are thinking of themselves more than they are thinking of the stupid thing you just said, so it is likely you will emerge from this awkwardness unscathed. You recognize that you need some new ideas for your paintings. You are sick of yourself and you are not alone in this! No one wants to see you keep plodding away with the same formula for making work. Change it up! It’s time for you to stop making paintings that look like a handy combination of five other artists. Be yourself, find your truth and stop worrying if anyone will like it. It is liberating to be repellant. It’s liberating to be repellant. Repeat this day in and day out.

Cancer 6/21-7/22
Whoever it was who told you to relax was wrong. You need to be hyper-vigilant this month as there are people and/or pets close to you who do not have your best interests at heart. Be aggressive and self-protective, you can never be too careful. However your only true way out of the social/interspecies conflict is to get to your studio – where you can enjoy indulging your strange fantasies and preoccupations. Escaping into the mind’s eye is often the best medicine when reality oppresses. Your work gets more tactile lately. Use your hands more: smear and press and poke. There are even chances for you to excel in intimacy this month if you let your strange fantasies reign freely in that department as well. People are more receptive than you think. As long as you remember to act like you’ve read a lot of books, your potential new friends and/or lovers are more likely to accept you and all your intensities.

Leo 7/23-8/22
Your charm is in high gear this month but you are not focused. Your challenge is to discipline your mind so you can get back on track with your painting and your daily routine. You need to have a schedule or you waste away the days in lala-land. There may be highly charged emotions with your significant other and you will need a cooling off period. Make sure your partner/friends/children all understand that your artwork is your main priority, no matter what. Sorry people! That’s how it is. You need to put your phone away and stop checking it incessantly. Focus on your paintings and remember what it feels like to lose track of all time. Your paintings require your full concentration, not your relationships. In other news, you need to start exercising again. You can feel that fat fold returning and there may be some chafing in your jeans. Be a hero and get motivated!

Virgo 8/23-9/22
Your equipment is going haywire. Your machines are breaking down. Even your limbs may be in disrepair. Do not think you can fix this on your own! You are not handy and you are terrible with self-care so call a professional. The current planetary aspect could spell trouble for you. You need to have a new outlook with your partner, or else things will be tense and you don’t have the emotional energy for tension at home. You are tired! This fact can be offset with a healthy exercise program. Try to limit hangovers to three times a week. Your paintings are looking good and you have plenty of opportunities. However there is something that feels a little lackluster in the studio. Go out and see shows, is what I don’t often recommend, but I am recommending now. You need a good dose of other people’s art to have a more vigorous and fulfilling relationship to your own.

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Your August Horoscope! by Crystal “Kitty” Shimski

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 Two Coats of Paint is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution – Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License. To use content beyond the scope of this license, permission is required.

Two Coats of Paint is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution – Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License. To use content beyond the scope of this license, permission is required.

2 thoughts on “Your September Horoscope! by Crystal “Kitty” Shimski”

  1. Thanks for my Virgo update. Pretty much spot on. Just had knee surgery and drug induced life after has been hell. Getting myself off and funny, I have only had 3 margaritas in 8 days!
    Karen Lastre Abstract painter with a colour field bent. 9/10/40

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